A (late) Friday 55 - Goodbye, Daddy

I close my eyes

They misunderstand,

Reassuring “It’s okay to cry”

But I’m just saying, “Goodbye.”

With eyes closed,

breaths deep

I can smell him next to me

Inhale – wood and grass, exhale.

Inhale – varnish and dishsoap, exhale.

Inhale – Old Spice and jetfuel, exhale.

Daddy, I love you, be at peace.

“Missy, I’m right here.”

My dad spent twenty years flying in the Air Force, and another (almost) 20 playing in a hardware store. He could make anything from wood, had the best-looking yard on the block, and thought I could do anything.

My father passed away yesterday morning, after a long, painful battle with multiple ailments. It was not a surprise, but I am still sad. My faith assures me that he is in a much better place, and I have no doubts of this. This is a photo of him and me on his birthday when I went home in August.

Baby Can I hold you

"....maybe if I told you the right words...at the right time...."

::sigh:: I love this song.

Why Jayne hates dating....

WARNING, WARNING,
DANGER, WILL ROBINSON, DANGER!
ANGRY PISSED-OFF FORTY-SOMETHING-YEAR-OLD WOMAN ON A RAMPAGE.


Dear Blewit,

I do not think we will be going out again.....

You are more new to this "dating in our forties," so I feel perhaps you need to know:

1. If a woman breaks the "don't accept a date for the following night" rule by accepting a date, it is rude to stand her up.

2. A text message is not the same as a phone call. Especially if the text message was regarding the date referenced in #1. (Note: said text was never received, although a text two days later was).

3. A missed call(4 days after date referenced in #1) is not the same as a phone call. Without caller I.D. I wouldn't know that you called. And if you don't leave a message, how am I to know that you didn't simply mis-dial?

4. If you email/text/call our friend-in-common, and tell her that, "you think you did something wrong..." you probably did do something wrong. SO WHY ARE YOU CALLING HER!?!?!? You didn't "wrong" her.
Idiot.....

5. When we finally talk, and I explain why I was minutely angry, it is probably stupid of you to retort, "Well, you should have called me and told me what I did."
No, I shouldn't, dumbsh!$. We have been on one date, which I initiated. The date that you initiated, you stood me up, without communication. Communication that followed (3 texts, 2 emails, 2 missed calls), was lacking any personal touch (um, like your voice).

If this is your best behavior, I think I'll pass.

Doctor, Doctor, Give Me the News...

::ring, ring!::

Hello?
Hey Doc!
Yes, who's calling?
This is Airplane Jayne. I, I hope you reme-
How could I forget you, APj? (geez, it's not like I haven't tried.) here....take these quizzes, and call me in the morning.

Men See You As: An Attainable Challenge See!?!?!? I AM attainable.

You know how to make your man crave more of you. But you also know when to show some interest back. You're good at keeping your man guessing. And over time, you'll let him know how you really feel Okay -- this all talked about "my man." "My man" crave, "my man" interest, "my man" guess, "my man" feel......where the hell is Mr. My? He sounds like a great catch!!!!

Do Men Find You a Challenge?

Guys Think You're Easy to Be With... But Not Easy

You're definitely a flirt - and a good one. But you also know that you shouldn't make a move on any cute guy who passes by. ummm...this is part of the problem: I don't know "moves." Err, at least moves that work. I am, however, great at moves that don't work... You save your seductive moves for someone who already knows the real you. crap! Now I've got to have "seductive" moves!?!? Good thing I'm taking Joy's class, eh? That way, your sex appeal is just part of the whole package. My mind goes elsewhere when the word "package" is used... Are You An Easy Girl? You Are Big Black Boots! no, I am not. I am Marc Jacobs Boots. These are butt-ugly. This is obviously a mistake.... You can be best described as: attitude You've got lots of it - and you love to give it err....you say "attitude" like it's a bad thing.... A guy has to be pretty gusty to hit on you no guts - just do it! (geez, that sounds like a Nike commercial, huh?) But if he's your type, you'll warm up... a little I will so do more than warm up. Obviously, this quiz was way off. I should be slinky heels. Or my hot Marc Jacobs boots. Your Vibe Is Secretly Sexy Sexy isn't exactly a word you'd use to describe yourself. But you have a quite allure that certain men feel appealing. So say some of my manfriends.....I don't see it.... You don't need to flaunt your stuff to be sexier. A little more confidence in yourself, and you'll really light up a room! Can't I just wear the boots? Won't those take care of it? What Kind of Sexy Girl Vibe Do You Have?