Monday, January 21, 2008


I don't know which was worse: the divorce or the dead hamster in the fridge....but I do know that neither of them led to sex! Jayne's tales of broken bones and missing toes and no sex. A hardware store date and one interrupted by a police chopper, and still no sex!

Ashtree Studios
5:00 PM, Friday, 2/29
2:00 PM, Saturday, 3/1
8:45 PM, Wednesday, 3/5

Okay my bloggies, it's in print, so it must be real.

Friday, January 18, 2008

55-Temper, temper

Grabbing the barstool with one hand,
She launched it towards the window,
Knowing shattering glass would silence and cease his assault.
It spun.
lazysusan-like on the floor, feet away from its target.
“Did that feel good?” he sneered.
“No,” she calmly replied, “But this will.”

She picked up the second stool, and let it fly.

I have been known to have a temper, although I think I do a pretty darn good job of keeping it in check. But this was one of my more “inspired” outbursts:

Voldemort and I were having an argument. Now, being one of six children, I know how to argue: you get your turn to say whatever you want, I don’t interrupt. And then, it’s my turn. Of course, it was my turn, and he kept interrupting, shutting me down, telling me I was wrong, etc. And then he would keep going – like it was his turn. WTF!?!?!?!? Suddenly, the quiet rage descended upon me, and I could see clearly the path to take. The vision showed that if I threw the heavy iron barstool through the window, he would be so startled that he would stop yelling and it would be my turn.

Well, it really was very logical in that quiet rage moment.

Monday, January 14, 2008

B-b-b-b-back to Blogthings!!!!!

What Airplane Jayne Means

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.

Please note - It is Blogthings, not I, who insists that I am the best. I'm not disagreeing, but I'm not the one who brought it up.

You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.
You have the classic "Type A" personality. know, this is the second time in the past few months that I have been called aggressive. As I said then, "You say, 'aggressive,' I say, 'persuasive."

You are fair, honest, and logical. You are a natural leader, and people respect you.

All I'm asking - is for a little Respect when you get home.
Whip it to me -

You never give up, and you will succeed... even if it takes you a hundred tries.

A hundred times!?!?!?!? Geez, that's an awful lot....

You are rational enough to see every part of a problem. You are great at giving other people advice.

Aye, lassie. But not so good at taking your own advice, eh?

You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something.
You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense.

You say "intense" like it's a bad thing. You don't mean that, do you? WELL....DO YOU!?!?!?

You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun.

::shiver:: sorry....I've gone to the store....back in a moment....

You are influential and persuasive.

I do prefer "persuasive" over "aggressive." Really.

You tend to have a lot of power over people.
Generally, you use your powers for good.

Bloggything is always going on and on about my powers. I have yet to see this "power" in action. TAKE OFF YOUR CLOTHES!
SEE!?!?!? Nada! Zeelch - Zero.

Occasionally, you do get a little selfish and persuade people to do things that are only in your interest.

oops....sorry about that "take off your clothes" thing...

You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.

hm? Did you say something? Sorry, Brad and I were just having s-

You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy.

Hey - just because you're paranoid doesn't mean that they're NOT out to get you.

You are a free spirit, and you resent anyone who tries to fence you in.

But tying me up is another story...

You are unpredictable, adventurous, and always a little surprising.

Yup. Sometimes it's a BIG surprise....
You may miss out by not settling down, but you're too busy having fun to care.

As I've said before: I'm not "settling" this time. I will continue to enjoy life. Hopefully I will find someone who is also so-inclined.

Saturday, January 12, 2008


YEA!!!! My Rogue show is written! Hacuna Matata. "It's our problem free....philosophy....."

oh shit. But now I've got to memorize it. and block it. and make it funny...

okay -- so maybe not quite so hacuna. maybe just matata....

But I'm dancing anyway...

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

Ew-Ee! Ew-Ee Baby!

Tomorrow, I leave for my cruise. You never know what will happen, who you'll meet, etc. But, it seems that Google knows I decided to ask Google about my cruise.

Mr. Google, what will it be like for Jayne on a cruise?WTF!?!?!? That's not a cruise ship -- maybe it has cruise missiles, but it is DEFINITELY not a ship. Although a missile might be kinda fun.
But I digress. I will rephrase the question:
Mr. Google, it's a CarnivalCRUISE! Not Carnival in Rio, you meathead. I'm getting a little frustrated. Now. Just. Listen. It's a Carnival Cruise, got that?
On the Elation.

Yes. You are right. He looks very happy. So happy, in fact, that he may just have a woo--

But wait--you're getting me sidetracked, again! Okay....let's just forget the whole boat thing. Obviously it's not your forte.

How about this: what will Jayne do for entertainment at night?

Okay - this actually does sorta kinda resemble something that I might do. 'cept my bunny is not blue. ever.

Okay my peeps! I am off on my sea adventure. I will try to blog from the boat...