Tuesday, March 31, 2009

I like dreaming....

Some of you remember my friend, Steve from this exchange. He and his much-better-half now reside in Sweden, and are planning their nuptials for this summer.
-yes, yes, they do everything backwards: child, move followed by a wedding, instead of wedding, move, and then child. A beautiful child, Anja, by the way, whom, you may recall, knows her Auntie Jayne quite well

I plan on traveling to Sweden this summer, and the trip has been on my mind, and, obviously, in my dreams, as can be seen in this email I thought I'd share with ya'll....

Dearest Steve and Kajsa,

So, I had this great dream. I'm at your wedding/moving party

- Yes, yes, you're moving
-What? I don't know!!?!?!? You just are--
--hey that's not important- remember, it's MY dream


I'm sitting at the end of the table with Anja on my left, when these two hot guys jostle each other for the seat on my right.
and here's the cool thing-

I knew they were both hot for me.


Yup. In my dreamworld, I am not sextarded.

::dances around the room::
uh-huh, uh-huh,

love, the sofrickinghot APj

ps #1 name was Michael, so he's out. Didn't catch #2's name, but he had a chest like a sailor. Perhaps he's with the.... SWEDISH NAVY!?!?

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

APj Smackdown

Sometimes I forget that I'm a 48 year-old woman.
Not necessarily a BAD thing -- for example, if I were on a date with a hot 32 year-old, and he made me forget that I was 48 -- GOOD THING.
Brawling with thugs? Not a GOOD THING.


We had finished striking all the Rogue sets and lights, and were heading for Rogue Storage. I saw something fly through the air and hit the brickwall of a store. My sister thought it was a skateboard, kicked by one of the two teenagers walking on the sidewalk.
It. was. not. a. skateboard.
It. was. a. puppy.

I made a face, and that is probably where the incident would have ended.

-except-

One of the teens squared up on the cowering puppy, kicked and started swinging.

And APj metamorphosed into The Hulk.

Brakes and tires squealing, I threw my seatbelt off, and leaped from the car,
"Motherf#c!ker! Touch that dog one more time, and I'll kick the sh!t out of you!"

He stopped swinging at the dog -
GOOD THING.
And started walking towards me
BAD THING
saying, "You dint see nothin' b!t#h! You dint see nothin' "

By this time, he and his friend are right in front of me -- and I'm realizing that he is at least 4 inches taller than me --
--but hey -- I'm a whole hell-of-a-lot crazier than him -- so I walk right up to him, jab him in the chest and retort, "Yeah? I saw the whole thing, a##ho!e! You don't --"

At this point, he and his ugly thug friend started backing away, with a "whatcha gonna do, b!tch? whatcha gonna do?"

"What am I gonna do?" I pulled out my cellphone, "This, A##ho!e!" and dialed 9-1-1.

Yes, yes, I know - I should have taken a picture with my cellphone. Damn adrenaline. And yes, yes, I realize (in hindsight), that this was not the smartest move I've ever made.

But I'd do it again. Yup. I'm crazy that way.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

2009 Rogue


We Rogued hard, and put 'em away wet.
-or something like that.

Here's a few pictures that I stole (mostly from Lecram) to share with you.

I'll be writing more about my Mann-I-Can over the weekend.