Rumplestilskin

Whoa! Have I been asleep? Gone? Missing? Nope, 'fraid not -- just fighting with the evil insurance on how much they were going to give me for Kermit......
Jayne's favorite moment? Hmmm, that would have to be when the adjuster informed me that, "You need to stop talking."
EXCUUUUUSE ME?!?!?
Multiple threats, and weeks later, I end up getting $1500 more than they offered me.

(Rhetorical) Questions to idiot noted above:

1. Who needs to stop talking NOW?
2. Who's your Daddy NOW?

okay, okay. done gloating......now it's time to be silly. I found this on Paul's site
-- by the way, please, Paul - come to Fresno for the Rogue--
--and thought it was hilarious!

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Jayne!

1. You should always store jayne in an airtight container in the fridge.
2. Jayne cannot jump.
3. Louisa May Alcott, author of 'Little Jayne', hated jayne and only wrote the book at her publisher's request.
4. Jayne can sleep for three and a half years.
5. The difference between jayne and a village is that jayne does not have a church!
6. If you lie on your back with your legs stretched it is impossible to sink in jayne!
7. An average beaver can cut down jayne every year.
8. Jayneocracy is government by jayne!
9. Jayne can drink over 25 gallons of water at a time.
10. Jayne can not regurgitate!

okay, some are obviously false:
2. Jayne can, and has jumped -- from airplanes, hence: the airplane jayne. Duh.
3. Lousia was a bitch. she just wanted me in the wrong way.
4. I don't think I've slept a total of 3 1/2 years in my life. Sleeping is a waste of time - I'll do it when I'm dead.
6. whoa......hmm......willing to consider as an experiment.....