Monday, September 01, 2008

Going to the store...

Stole this from Lime.....(stealing from her is so much fun!!!)

I give you money and send you into the grocery store to pick up 5 items. You can only pick one thing from the following departments, what is it?
Produce: Strawberries. No! wait! One fricking strawberry!?!?!?? Scratch that (the choice, not the berry. Cause I’m sure if I scratch it, they’re gonna make me fricking buy it) – let’s make it a peach. ‘cause at least it’s good for a few bites.

Frozen: Ben&Jerry’s Dave Matthews Ice Magic Brownies. I’m sure there are no illegal substances in this…..really….

Meat: The butcher. The hot one.

Dairy: whip cream. For the butcher

Canned goods: I don’t do canned. Ewww….

Let's say we're heading out for a weekend getaway. You're only allowed to bring 3 articles of clothing with you. So, what's in your bag?
Who’s the “you” that’s taking me? Seriously, it makes a difference. I mean, how am I supposed to pack if I don’t know “who’s” taking me and where “you’s” taking me to? Forget it, “you” is obviously more self-centered than I am if “you” can’t tell me who “you” is, and where “we’re” going. Jerk.

If I was to listen in on one of your conversations throughout the day, what 4 phrases or words would I be most likely to hear? Please remember, I teach….
“Thank you.” Seriously, when I ask my class to be quiet, I always thank them afterwards.

After all, it is all about me. Yes, I know: I am probably damaging them forever. This leads me to my next phrase:

Whatevah. Deal with it.

Why? Why not?

You're driving down the road, and suddenly you're hit with this sense of road rage. What 3 factors probably contributed to it?
The futhermucker with the Fish on his car that just fricking cut me off. ASSHOLE!!!!!

The DJ on the radio that WON’T STOP TALKING AND PLAY THE DAMN SONG!!!

On the way to work early, so I can get things done before school starts, I realize THAT IT’S A FRICKING HOLIDAY!!!

Sweet, you just scored a whole afternoon to yourself. We're talking a 3 hour block with nobody around. What 5 activities might we find you doing?
None-of-yer-business.

Reading a book.

Contemplating cleaning the house.

Going to a movie

Talking to a friend.


We're going to the zoo. But, it looks like it could start storming, so it'll have to be a quick visit. What 3 exhibits do we have to get to?
Lions

And Tigers

And bears.

Oh my!

You just scored tickets to the taping of any show that comes on t.v. of your choice. You can pick 4, so what are you going to see?
TV of my choice? Easy-peasy, I would choose: Brad Pitt’s TV

George Clooney’s TV

Johnny Depp’s TV

Daniel Craig’s TV

Oh….you just had bad grammar? (Mis)placing your modifiers? Hmmpf. Why am I not surprised….. You meant to say a SHOW of my choice….fine (Jerk)

Battlestar Galactica (the new series)

Robin Hood (on the BBC)
Dr. Who (currently on the BBC)

Burn Notice.

Somebody stole your purse/wallet…in order to get it back, you have to name 5 things you know are inside to claim it. So, what's in there?
2 pieces of candy (probably leftover from a dinner at Livingstones during the Rogue)

Dental floss (don’t leave home without it)

Something-else-they-say-to-always-have (although it expires at the end of this year)

Burts Bees lip balm

A poem. It’s personal


You are at a job fair, and asked in what areas you are interested in pursuing a career. Let's pretend you have every talent and ability to be whatever you wanted, so what 4 careers would be fun for you?
Teacher (yup – I have my dream job)

Comedic actress (I think I’ve got the chops. Not the boobs, mind you, but the chops)

Empress of the World.

Lady Jayne, wife of George Clooney


If you could go back and talk to the old you, when you were in high school, and inform yourself of 4 things, what would you say?

Ask him out – he’ll probably say yes.

Try out for the musical, you are just as good as they are.

Don’t worry about what they think.

Wait. He’s not worth it.

6 comments:

lime said...

there was one other person who stole this from me and i must share one of her ice cream flavors....george clooney.

genius no?

oh, and since you stole this from me you can assume i am the one who is whisking you away for a whirlwind tour of buses with poles.

airplanejayne said...

A CLOONEY CONE!!!!

I'll take a double--

no, wait -- a triple--

no, wait! I want the whole bucket!!!!

...sorry -- I went to the store...

lecram said...

You don't do canned goods... liked whipped cream?

airplanejayne said...

Lecram- okay....I make an exception for whipped cream. and chocolate syrup.

KFarmer said...

Great steal APJ~ You had me rolling! :)

mssolitaire said...

hahahahahaha!!!! Awe I love this! :)