Monday, June 20, 2005


WARNING: Nicknames have a way of just...happening. As you know, I love nicknames, and usually try to find one for everyone. Sometimes the name comes quickly, sometimes they come slowly....but....they always come. Ewww, you nasty dirty mind. Out of the gutter! Geez, Jade was right! To the story!

So there I was, bright red and sure that I’d not heard what I thought I’d just heard.
And the Viking Princess, or VP, (aka Kajsa) is screaming, “What did he just say?!?!?”
And Superman Steve….well, Steve’s jaw has dropped, he is blushing (and hey, I’ve known the guy for ten years, and never seen him blush), and he’s frantically reaching for the answering machine—
“Did your little brother just say what I think he said?”
“Steve,” ordered Kajsa, “Rewind that tape! Oh my go—“
So, as the tape rewinds, let me fill you in:
I had just arrived in SF for one of Steve’s shows. Steve and I were catching up on all the latest Party Element and Rogue gossip, when the VP (who doesn’t gossip nearly as much as Steve and I, but we love her anyway) interrupts--
“Oh, Steve! Your brother Dave called while I was on the phone. I let it go to voice mail.”
Now, my friends, - let me interject some back story here (again), as that voice mail tape is rewinding: Dave is Steve’s little brother. Like Steve, Dave was also bitten by the comedy bug: he is a standup comedian in Philadelphia. Very quick, very witty. I met him once – five years ago when Steve did his very first standup show. Funny guy….nice guy--or so I thought, until
that tape started playing.
“Hiya Steve! Hiya Kajsa! Dave here. Yea, went to see Joe Jackson last night. Good show! I’m on my way – gonna do a show at ______________. Hey tell Airplane Jayne I said, “Hi –“

Steve is beaming. You can almost hear his thoughts, “What a good kid brother. He remembered APj was coming up this weekend. He’s saying, ‘Hi’ to my friend”

“How sweet,” I thought, “What a nice kid brother—“

And the tape continued “Heh-heh , yea – tell Airplane Jayne ‘Hi!’ – I wouldn’t mind – ya know – a ten cent ride—“

This is where we came in on this story – Me blushing (which takes a lot, mind you), Kajsa squealing, and Superman Steve gob-smacked……
Multiple playings of the tape had the three of us rolling on the floor and me laughing so hard I was in tears.

Jayne: But Steve, what exactly is a “Ten cent ride?”
Steve: I don’t know. But I say, let’s call him and find out. (dialing phone on speaker.)
Ring-ring! Ring-ring!
Dave: Hey big bro!
Steve: Hey Dave. Whatcha doing?
Dave: I’m going on in 20 minutes! Whazzup?
Steve: Well, we’re kind of confused. Just exactly what is a “ten-cent-ride?”
Dave: (wicked/nasty laugh) Heh-heh, well –
Jayne: (not wanting to hear, especially after “heh-heh) Yes, Dave dahling, just exactly what are you expecting to get for ten cents?
Dave: (stammering) Ohh! Airplane Jayne! Ohh! Ahhh, probably ahh, not much of anything now, huh?

Needless to say, we called Dave at least ten (ha-ha) times over the weekend – harassing him relentlessly. Poor child….but I don’t feel sorry for him – not at all! After all, he brought it upon himself.

But on the bright side, Dave did get what he truly has been wanting for five long years…, not that, you dirty minded Rogues! He finally got a nickname! He is no longer known as “Dave,” Steve’s kid brother…..He is now known, affectionately, as:



lecram sinun said...

Got a ten cent ticket to ride,
Got a ten cent ticket to Ri-hi-hide,
Got a ten cent ticket to ride,
But Jayne don't bare,

That Jaynie don'r bare, (3x)

airplanejayne said...

yea THANKS, Lecram... - now I've got that tune stuck in my head!


jade ed girl said...

But hey- that's better than the voices, right?

airplanejayne said...

yes, Jade...much better then the voices.....
oh no!!!
what if...
what if the voices....
what if the voices start singing THAT SONG!?!?!?!?

scarysquirrelman said...

i'd have given you a quarter.

airplanejayne said...

"Hey Big Spender!"