Sunday, August 14, 2005

Driving through Life

"Most of the conflicts in the world have been perpetuated on the delusion that God needs help."
Lecram made the above statement in a recent post, and posed the following question:
How would I craft that?

Well, I would set the scene in a car! It is, after all, where we American's spend most of our time. Here's how the dialogue would go:

“Ya know, it’s faster if you take the freeway.”

“Sometimes fast isn’t the only factor. Sometimes, my son—“

“Hey! You’re driving on the shoulder! What’s wrong—Wow! Did ya’ see that car cross the middle line?! Geez we could’ve been hurt. So,dude, whatd’ya’ say yer name was?

“ My name? Son, have you forgotten my name so soon? My name is—“

“Hey! Whatza matter wit’ ya’ now! Quit driving in the middle of the ro--. Holy shit! I didn’t see that car stalled on the side of the road. Sorry….what were we talking about? (pause) Oh yeah! Dude! I ‘preciate the ride and all, but how far are ya’ going?”

“Son, I can take you as far as you are going. All I ask is that you let me drive.”

“That’s cool, man. I’ll let ya’ drive. I ‘m a cool passenger, dude--err–sorry, what’s your name, again?”

“Son – my name is—“

“Dude! Why’re ya’ stopping? We’re on the freeway! Ya need to move! (pause) Dude! (pause) Man!”

“Son….you must trust me—“

“Dude, I ain’t yer son, and why should I trus--. Sonofabitch! Didya see that! Holyshit! That truck just jackknifed in front of us! Dude, you must have good eyes to have seen that coming. Sorry I yelled at you ‘bout stopping, dude. –Whatdya say your name is?”

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