Dear Family, friends, bloggers and stalkers:
All is crazy here -- did I tell you news from the doctor? I can't remember, so I'll tell you again:
As some of you know, my throat has been bothering me again. I was afraid I had another tumor, so I finally sucked it up (courage, not the tumor), and went to see the specialist. Some of you may remember him as the only man I know who apologized for gagging me.
I have definite feelings for this man.
"I remember you," he greeted me, "you're funny."
Come her little boy and sit on my lap, I thought.
"You're not so bad yourself," I replied.
"Are you ready for this again?"
"I've thought of nothing else....all day."
With the grace of a gazelle-
-wait, that's kinda odd: a gazelle in a doctor's office -
With the grace of a gifted surgeon, Dr. F gently pulled my tongue out, inserted a long (size does matter) tube-mounted camera into my mouth
-and I gagged. Actually, he gagged me three times (show-off), but who's counting? But, as before, Dr. F was cordial and sweet, apologizing, wiping my chin and getting me a glass of water before proudly announcing, "It does not look like a tumor"
Wouldn't it have been great if he'd said it like Arnold?
But, long story (and the more boring part of the story) short: no surgery (yeah!), but loads of change: no coffee, no tea, no alcohol, no chocolate. seems the scar tissue is being attacked by the acids of Jayne. Geesh, sounds like an episode of Star Trek:
"Captain! the acids are eating away the outsides!"
"I'm an Engineer, not a Doctor!"
You get the point..
So....to all who have enjoyed the raspy-voiced warrior known as APj - relax. That soft, raspy voice is here to stay.
But if you're drinking a mocha latte in front of me....I just may have to cut you down.